10 Resolutions for Living

Ten Resolutions for living -
with chronic pain or illness

1. I realize that my condition has not been completely cured or resolved by medical treatment, or the force of my will, by waiting, other sources of help, or by deciding it's not important.

I am prepared to accept this and move in a new direction.

2. I recognize that I need a positive relationship with my body and symptoms.

I have seen that some of my efforts to cope have not worked as well for me or others as I had hoped. I am learning positive ways to live with this condition

3. I let go of parts of my past life that are over.

I may grieve what is lost, but I am committed to living well with what is. I face my present reality with creativity and vigor. I find new ways to make my life rewarding.

4. I forgive myself for having had difficulties.

I recognize that I am human, and have human limitations like everyone. I accept that I am imperfect, and can fall short even with the best intentions. I choose to develop the skills I need to deal with my condition and help myself live as well as I can.

5. I build and heal my relationships with others.

Where I have made mistakes with others in my efforts to live with my condition, I am ready to seek new and even better relationships with them.

6. I forgive anyone I have blamed for my condition or for mistreatment.

Forgiving others and letting go of blame, I am free to move forward. I take full responsibility for how I create the rest of my life.

7. I recognize mental and physical habits and reactions involved in my condition.

Though I have tried my best, some habits are inefficient or not good for me. I am committed to developing ways of thinking and acting that better my situation.

8. I acknowledge ways my symptoms are reinforced.

Sometimes, whether I have been aware of it or not, symptoms have had payoffs. I do not need to to avoid or obtain things, protect myself, or deal with other people through them. I resolve to be assertive, courageous and honest in my dealings with the world.

9. I understand how I can become dependent in unhealthy ways -- on people, on medications, drugs, alcohol, on organizations, on objects, on ideas.
I am willing to release these things and regain my power and control over my life. I rely on people and things only if they strengthen and nourish me.

10. I am ready to make hard but positive choices and to see them through.

I am open to new ideas and ways of living. When I have made these changes part of my life, I can also help others

By Brian Grady, Ph.D. http://www.tenresolutions.org/

This may be reproduced freely, provided that this notice is included.

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What patients want their family to understand about their chronic pain condition

A recent group of chronic pain patients were asked the question, "What do you want your family
to understand about your chronic pain condition?" By far, the over-whelming response
was, "I want them to understand that my pain is real."

Unlike an amputation or disease state that produces visible changes in the patient’
s appearance, pain is invisible. Often times it is only the patient’s pain behaviors
(e.g., moans, facial grimaces, shallow breathing, etc.) that reveal their misery.
Patients struggle on a daily basis to deal with their condition by controlling
their pain behaviors.

Unfortunately, the reward for their efforts to successfully adapt to their pain
is not support, but suspicion. The better able they are to laugh in spite of the
pain or adapt their lives to fulfilling activities within their limitations, the more
others question the validity of their condition. The negative reaction or suspicion
from others often triggers social withdrawal, resentment, and an overall decreased
level of functioning on the part of the patient. The patient’s condition only worsens
under these circumstances.

So what can be done to address this problem? The answer is EDUCATION.
The more family members and friends understand about chronic pain and
rehabilitation, the less misunderstanding about their conditions will occur.
Probably the best means of education for significant others is participation in t
he patient’s rehabilitation program. At Hillside’s Chronic Pain Rehabilitation Program
we strongly encourage family participation. Family members not only receive
information from the treatment staff, they are afforded the opportunity to interact
with other patients and families in order to identify common issues,
interventions and often times develop support networks

http://www.hillside-rehab.org/chronic_pain.htm